Iowa

Iowa

The news yesterday came to me as a surprise. Iowa has become one of three states in the Union to legally recognize gay marriage. Honestly, Iowa wasn't even on my radar. I'd suspected New Jersey would be the next state to claim that honorable distinction. And while I'm sure my surprise bespeaks volumes of my level of awareness and lack of adequate participation within the movement to gain equality, I could not be more proud nor feel this win more personally.

So far, the states that have recognized gay marriage, (Massachusetts, Connecticut, and, however briefly, California), have all been seen as overwhelmingly liberal states. And while that's to be expected on this issue, it also makes our progress there easier for social-conservatives to dismiss. The status of our rights in those states can be explained away as radical exceptions and the result of unchecked liberal rule run amok. They have the opportunity to fool themselves into believing that our progress is temporary, unpopular, (immoral), and ultimately fruitless on a national scale. Iowa isn't liberal. They aren't conservative either. They're a moderate Midwest state that's pretty evenly divided between Democrats and Republicans. They're overwhelmingly christian and heavily evangelical. Iowa is the Heartland that politicians talk about, the Real America that social-conservatives believed would turn us away. With this ruling, Iowa instead acknowledges and accepts us in the eyes of the law. And while our success there may be tenuous, as it was in California, it is still an undeniable win in the face of great obstacles.

Every judge, every vote, every sign, march, and rainbow sticker demanding equality is an important step. And each voice that speaks out emboldens the next. One in every ten people, across every race, culture, and gender, are homosexual. I hope that someday our children will be horrified that Georgia's state constitution forbade the recognition of our marriage. I hope their generation will never be forced to argue against the hypocrisy of denying 10% of our population the rights held as fundamental by the other 90%.

-Kate

Okay, yes, there are lots of decisions and options for this wedding of ours, but maybe we should take a step back and explain the name of this blog.

Kate and I met on Match.com. I was new to Atlanta and wanted to make friends, get to know the area and maybe, just maybe, go on a few dates. I joined a flag football team, started volunteering at an animal shelter and found a new church. I mean, really, other than standing in the organic vegetarian section of the grocery store, what better way to meet the local lesbians? I’d never tried online dating, but I thought, what the heck, new city, new approach.

In choosing my Match screen name I combined two previous nicknames. It was once decided that were I ever in prison, I would be known as Little Red (it was also said I wouldn’t do well in jail, but that’s another story). Also, As an alternative to finishing my graduate dissertation, I briefly considered becoming a female sumo wrestler. My name would be JoMo and I was dedicated to gaining the necessary weight (again, another story for another time). To make a unique Match.com username, I combined them to become LittleRedJoMo.

The last tidbit you need to know is that I was raised in the era of Hooked on Phonics, and man, am I ever. I sound out a word based on how the letters sound, giving no attention to the overall combination. This is how you mispronounce the name Bookie (the WSU bookstore) as Boo-key. B-o-o sounds like boo, k-i-e sounds like key. Done deal. No matter that b-o-o-k spells book.

So when I saw a striking profile picture accompanied by the username ‘ohsokate’ I thought, “That’s funny, she doesn’t look Asian. Why would someone not Asian pick the name (spelling it like I was saying it) oh-sokah-tay (said with hands together, bowing at the waist)?” But I was smitten by the beautiful woman that sported the tag line “On the brighter side” and listed hobbies such as photography and billiards. I decided to take a chance and send an email, but because I am the biggest chicken in the world, I needed some help in composing the note. I turned to my ever-supportive friend Sheila. She agreed it was weird that a non-Asian person would call themselves oh-sokah-tay, but liked the sounds of the profile. I sent a short email and to my delight, three very long days later, got a response! I again turned to Sheila for help in crafting my reply. She wanted to see oh-sokah-tay's profile, so I sent it to her. Sheila immediately started laughing and said, “You goof, it’s oh so Kate! Her name is Kate!” Oh so embarrassed.

In creating this blogsite, Kate decided to merge our screen names into OhSoJoMo. Even a phonics addict such as myself can read that.

-Jodi